Sunday, February 21, 2010

Sunday night

Weird weekend. And it finished weird too.

There's this hotel on Hayes rd. that I've taken women to, who struck me as prostitutes. There's nothing wrong with being a prostitute, but usually they don't tip. You'd think they'd be smart enough to want to be on the right side of everybody in their little world. Nope.

Anyway, I get this girl, she's around 21 out of this hotel and she wants a round trip to Arby's. Ok. I've also got Red Robin going to 51 & 151 to get so I tell the girl, ok I'll do her round trip but how we do it is going to depend on what the other passenger is doing. Between the motel and Red Robin her phone rings and she starts talking to this john. The waitress from Red Robin gets in, she wants to go to Walgreen's.

So I tell the girl with the phone we'll drop the waitress off before we go to Arby's. The entire time the waitress is in the cab the girl with the phone is talking to 2 different john's. 'I get $200 for this, I get $150 for that. No, you can't sleep in bed with me all night, but we can sort of work out what you want for $250.', and so on.

Waitress gets out, and I ask the kid where bozo's like the one she just finished talking to get her number from. 'Oh, places.............' I tell the kid that the cab is a public place and if I was her, I'd turn that cell phone off when I got in the cab. I also made a loud comment about a waitress not tipping, kid apparently got that, she tipped $2.00. First time any of the prostitutes tipped.

Then the guy calls back and wants directions to where she is. So I ask her where he is, she tells me HWY 14 coming into the south side of town. Ok, tell the guy to take the beltline east to I90, get off at East Washington, get on the frontage road on the north side of the street, go back toward the interstate and he'll see the place you say you want to meet him at. She had almost $35.00 in cab fare and Arby's, for a couple of combo's.

I then checked it in. Worst Sunday I've had in over a year.

Clueless people. Simply Clueless.

Saturday, February 20, 2010

The rabbi and the preacher

I had a Hasidic Rebbe in my cab Thursday night. Before he got in my cab he asked at least 10 drivers in the cab stand at the airport to high flag his ride to the park and ride for less than 20 bucks. He was very persistent. I must go and discuss this with the local guy. It's dismaying that such a pious fellow on the face of it would ask 10 guys to rip off their employers.

When he was putting his stuff in my trunk I said, "Erev tov." As we drove down the street he asked me if I was Jewish and I said, "ken." For those of you who haven't taken Hebrew, that was good evening and yes. We got as far as, "Koreemli hoffny", and I had to offer explanation in English, I guess my accent is as bad as his English accent was.

The preacher is a driver who's been driving about half as long as I have. He was telling me about doing stuff he did when he was a kid. Guess he was a banger in southern CA. Wild stories. He worries about people not understanding. Like the rebbe, he's got enough kids to put a football team on a field. I wonder what he's going to do when the first one of his kids bangs. He can say they won't all he wants, but they're kids, like he was.

I had to do this post on the sabbath, since the guy asking drivers to rip their boss's made a big deal out of did I observe the sabbath. I say, "Why is today different than any other day?" This is a classic Jewish question about the sabbath, it's supposed to be that you observe the desires of the Almighty every day, right? I need the money every day.

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

I've had too much weighing me down lately

Before I forget, I don't speak to The Elder anymore. Seems there was a call at Majestic that went to Witte Saturday night, and he bid for it and got it. I pulled past Majestic and 4 girls wanted a ride to Landon so I took them. Elder watched me load the flags, and followed me up to the square, told the dispatcher that I'd stolen his call, pulled along side of me and screamed that I owed him an envelope. Now, while he's doing this, his people probably came out of Majestic and got into yet another cab and left. So Sunday night, JJ lets him accuse me of being a thief over the radio. And he won't let go of it. He loses a friend, he apparantly didn't get his $7 when it was super busy and he just should have moved on, what an idiot. He's not worth talking to.

I had an interesting conversation with Schnidley. He told me about an armed robbery/car jacking from years ago. So, Friday, I'm loading this guy with alzhimers from an adult day care, and I said to myself, "If anybody says to me they're going to blow my head off if I don't give them the money, I'm going to tell them to do it." I never intended to live to this age, I don't much care for being old, there's nobody to take care of me in my old age, I don't want to feel it, and I don't want to see it coming. So, I'll toss it into reverse and floor it, and take it from there. It always helps if you've thought of it in advance, and have a plan.

I visited another driver yesterday, and she told me I wasn't happy. She's right.

However, she had another guest who brought my spirits up a lot. The guest was a person named TJ that I know from the dog park. I also pretty much know Lynette from the dog park. So it was mostly a meeting of 3 dog park people. But I've known Lynette for many years, she drove a red and white before she drove a yellow cab. It was a really great, really informative discussion.

I was able to make a decision that would relive a lot of the discomfort I've had about my living situation. Lynette assures me that Smiley (my dog) can stay with her for a while if need be, and I trust her to be as good as her word on that. I can stay in a motel.

TJ was a cop for a number of years, so I asked TJ a question like, you've been in court more than most people, how does a judge react to a con artist? She said that judges don't like them, and that they can do what ever they want in their court room. So what I'm going to do with my con artist landlord/room mate is tape the rent check to his door, get a couple of friends to come over and put a dirty thumb print on the edge of the door and check, and come back in March and verify that it's still there. My room mate won't come and take the check, he's going to say I didn't pay the rent, when the issue will really be he didn't accept payment. Something else she said was, he won't get in front of a judge quickly. That's something I hadn't taken into account, but she made a big deal out of it. As soon as the snow is gone, I pretty much want to be gone from here too. So, by the time it gets to court, I might be gone anyway.

Something else that both of them told me that was fascinating was how contrived both police departments and schools are. When I was a kid, I didn't fit in well in school, and the older I get, the more I question if I ever had a chance. Both Lynette and TJ are former school teachers, and both say that the office politics of being a school teacher are intense. This says to me that if some of the teachers don't like your mother, you will will get bad grades, get behaviour evaluations saying you don't get along well, and so on. When I was a kid, my mother was disliked by the elementary school staff in general, and I can fully understand why. My mother and father were of the opinion that the school should pretty much raise their children, and the school didn't agree. By the time my brother and sister hit the schools my mother knew better than to push it that way, but it followed me all the way through.

This said, I also have to color it a bit with the change in society over the years. I wonder if policing was the cherry job then that it is today. Teaching certainly wasn't. Back then, a teacher didn't make a whole lot more than a guy in a car plant with 10 years on the job. Hard to say. All the people who could say are motly dead.

In my old age I've become something of an expert in not getting tickets. There's a technique to it, and even when I've deserved a ticket, they've let me off recently.

Poor quality rambling post isn't it? Oh well...............

Monday, February 15, 2010

Make my day

I had some of the most obnoxious passengers I've ever had in my cab over the weekend.

Friday night these 2 sweet little faggots get in the cab going to Plan B. Actually, I shouldn't say that. One of them was rail thin, gestured with a limp wrist, and spoke that whiny nelly dialect of fag. The other was a tough guy, hair cut in a mohawk. They were young, and 2 other folks got in going to a different destination. Less than 2 blocks into the ride, the kid with the mohawk says, "I think it's really going to stink in here in a minute. I just farted, ha ha, about a week ago I emptied 12 guys out of the kitchen at a gay mens party, ha ha."

So I rolled down the windows, and it really did stink. The other passengers agreed it really stunk, and the guy said, he might have to fart again ha ha before we got to the bar. So I left the windows down. The whiny one complained that he was cold. I said something about the guy shitting himself in my cab so the windows would stay down. So the tough guy pulled out his cell phone and called (really foul mouth) and told the dispatcher to order me to roll up the windows. I pointed out that I'd turned the radio off at that point.

Just like so many obnoxious bastards before him, he was going to have me fired by 9 am Monday morning. Then when we got a block from the bar, he said he wasn't going to pay. I forgot that I have cop doors in the back seat, most cabs they turn that feature off in, but if I lock them, they can't unlock them. I went to do a fast Uturn through a gas station and he had the door open and was trying to leap. He did leap, and I grabbed the whiny ones coat. He's going to kick my ass. "I'm going to kick you ass old man."

"Son, you're not going to kick anybody's ass."

At moments like that it's real tempting to get out and show him how pathetic his skills are, but he'd keep getting up until I did something to keep him down, and for doing that the cops would take me to jail.

I had these 2 slick little putz's from Long Island who said take us to Majestic, then when we got there, their friends weren't there so they started this, no we said Orphiem crap. It wasn't worth a confrontation, but I did tell the little putz that paid that he'd never get in my cab again, and I will call him a putz to his face if he ever tries. I took a long look at him before I gave change to memorize his pudgy face and dimensions.

And finally, drum roll please, I had the 2 pair from the tittie bar between Middleton and Cross Plains going to campus. 2 guys, and 2 girls, all 4 went to look at the girls. So the guy who's in the back seat, starts asking the woman in the middle for a blow job. Normally you hear something like shut the fuck up, or stone silence, but she was handling it. So I let her handle it. About 3 miles into the ride she's getting fed up with it, and I tell the guy to shut up, now he's going to kick my ass. So I lock the back seat doors. Lady in the middle seat says kick him out, I say I've got a better idea. My plan is to take him to State st., find a cop, and he can spend the weekend in jail for sexual assault, and disorderly. Ladies don't want to be in that police report, so they say they'll drop it if their cab fare is paid, so I make the guy who hasn't done anything pay for him and his room mates ride, and pay for the ladies ride. Expensive trip to the titty bar.

I take the ladies to close to where they live and they say let us out at Dayton and Mills, so I did. Mr. Mouth gets out too. Guy who paid says take me home. I get most of a single block and he says, "I have to get out. I have to make sure he doesn't do anything bad."

How did that turn out? Who knows, who cares. What fun, right?

Thursday, February 11, 2010

Amazing weekend

It was a simply amazing weekend. I had a journalist who told me what I needed to thread my blog stories together and make a book out of it. I had a couple of lawyers who told me how to deal with my landlord/roomate. Lynetto said I could stash some of my junk in her garage. And........

Drum roll.................................

I had that thread I needed walk into my life. How did that go????????????

Well, Eric was on the radio abusing a new driver, nothing new about that. It was Sunday night. I keyed the mike and said 72, and waited for him to get back to me. Eventually he did. But when this actually happened Eric was on phones and Brown was on the radio. The issue was a paper jam in the MDT units. I explained how to fix it, and Eric crossed over and went into a tirade about how I was wasting radio time. So, instead of working 2p-2a, I only worked 2a-10p to spite them. That put me in the office about 10:15pm.

This lady came in and she looked like she was ready to cry. I asked if she was the new kid and she said she was. Every time I'd been in the office earlier that night and she'd been trying to get help from dispatch, Eric had been laughing his ass off. I never realized what a pri#k Eric was before then, but he's a huge one. The 3 of them JJ, Bro*n, and Eric, all read this guys, you're evil. So, I agree to take this lady out for private lessons, and get in her cab as a rider.

TCR was NOT pleased. I realized that they'd done the same thing to me 21 years ago. Way it works is, trainer says to the office, 'This driver is not going to work out.' Office says ok, and the bums rush begins. Only a true glutton for punishment survives this, and I guess I'm a true glutton for punishment. So, now I'm making a driver who won't work out, work out. Yet another strike against me, but hey, they can only hate me so much so does it matter? Nope.

AND.......... Had a journalist in my cab who advised me on making this blog a book. He said I needed a common thread. Well that new driver is the thread. She's 35ish, just like I was. She will be a real cab driver too. I touched a life. People asked me if I touched lives, well I try not to, but yet again I touched one. I created a cab driver.

AND........ Had a couple of lawyers in the cab, they told me how to deal with my roomate/landlord, and the work begins to get out of this hole. Lynetto said I could stash some of my equipment at her place, now the work begins. I really will get this place comdemned, the county will do it, and the bugs and rodents will be the basis.

AND........ I even made money. Wow.

Monday, January 25, 2010

The happiest Badger cab.

In the photo of me, you also see the happiest Badger cab. Why is it the happiest cab...........

I went combing through the blog looking for this story and couldn't find it. It's my next first chapter attempt. How could I have possibly left it out?

Goes like this:

I only ever got one brand new cab. It was 71 I think (171), and it was back in the Dodge Diplomat days. Some people like Mean Gene and Boom Town get a lot of new cabs but they whine for them. I don't. And the fact of the matter is, I like driving junk anyway. 72 these days has a maj0r dent in the right front fender that they say Gooooner left there for me. Thanks alot Rabbit. (yes the guy has 2 nicknames) Where was I..........

I was given this new cab, first ever shift driven in it to drive, back in the day. I think it was a Friday night, but it could have been Saturday. I'm trolling for drunks on State street around 10:00 pm and this couple wave at me. They want to go to Squaw Bay. Cool, hop in.

We get to about Southtown and the Belt and this lady asks if anybody's ever had sex in my cab. I say not so far. She asks if they can have sex in the back seat. What a way to christen a new cab right? "If you're willing to pay for it, I don't care what you do in the back seat."

She asks how we should do this thing and I suggest driving west on the belt line until the fellow is finished. She says do it, and we're off.

I got back on the belt line west bound and got all the way to Airport rd., before she said they were done. Then I turned around and went back to Southtowne. Very nice fare!!

I took them to their house, and she danced from the cab to the front door. The guy sat there in the back seat with that stupid shit eating look on him for a minute then he slowly plodded to the door. And I figured that any cab that was used for getting a piece on it's maiden cruise had to be the happiest cab in the fleet. What do you think?

And I think I'll do my next chapter one rewrite using this as the first story. I've tried a dry explanitory, and I didn't like it much. I've tried violence, and it's ok, but not really good enough, but this is kind of catchy. Many passengers ask if anybody's ever gotten a piece in the back seat, it's a sort of romantic idea, in a real coarse sort of way. Well.......... worst that can happen is it will become yet another first chapter that didn't work.

Next try

My next try for rewriting this blog as a book is going to start with the happiest cab. Everybody likes sex, right?

Over the weekend I finally saw something I wondered why I'd never seen it before. Happened like this:

I get this guy in at the airport going to west HS. He's a nice guy and I have a dead fitter to bid on at Oscars going to the square, so I bid on it and get it, it's Sims going to Genna's. This guy get's in, I've seen him before.

We get to Genna's and he's fumbling for money for a LONG time, then he starts saying he already paid me. I've always wondered when somebody would claim they already paid. Well it finally happened. Cops eventually pulled a wad of cash out of his pocket and I got paid. He was doing it on purpose, and I know how it goes, a couple of drivers know him to be a dirt bag so they make him pay up front, and the rest get pissed off at the stalling act and curse him out of the cab.

Well........ John of 22 Langdon, you never ride in my cab again, pay up front or no pay up front. I don't give a damn if you'll be late for work and it's a sober ride to work that you intend to pay for or not, you don't ride. PERIOD. Ever again. John rides from 22 Langdon to Oscars, and from Sims to Genna's and from Genna's and the Rustic to 22 Langdon. And I won't simply tell the man on the radio that I won't take you, I'll forget to tell him anything, so you will for sure be late.

And to the other drivers who take this ass hole and make him pay up front, you help him steal from other drivers, you should refuse to take him. He has his act down. You've helped him develope it.

After fucking around for almost 20 minutes with this asshole John in the parking ramp under the PMI I finally get back to the cab and the consultant who'd traveled for 30 hours was still in the back seat. He wasn't in a rage. Very nice fellow. He paid without complaint. I should have given him the ride for free, but couldn't afford to.

On a darker note, Hamdinger is gone. I stopped talking to him a month ago because he stepped on a call I was up for just because he was Hamdinger. He smiled in the lot and said hello and I walked past him without speaking, and he said, "I guess you're mad at me."

Well, I was. 6 bucks is 6 bucks, and he took it out of my pocket. I wouldn't have done that to him if I was in the wrong, or if I knew he was going to get canned. Only now he's gone, and until and if he gets hired on with Mad Taxi, he's gone for good and I'll never see him again. We worked together for almost 20 years. He's an idiot anyhow. The mamasita he married will probably dump him and his life will probably fall apart. Sorry Gruber, ah............ sorry is all I got to say, you're in a lot of shit now. It kind of reminds me of a guy I knew back in '84 who got himself murdered and how all that came about, sad stories, why...............