I've been writing, I just haven't been writing much here. So.......... What I'm going to do is post some of the things that I've written elsewhere, and see if y'all like them. This is mostly cab stuff, only perhaps fictionalized or polished or what ever.
This first one is about what is sometimes called, 'A heavy load'
Eleven (Former title - A Few - )
Friday, April 23, 2010
Saturday, April 3, 2010
Change of scenery
I haven't gotten around to it yet, but I need a new permit. I think I'll apply for 2, both the other cab companies in town. They didn't like what I said, but nobody called me a liar. So how does that work? My intention was to return to driving days and they said I couldn't.
Andre, you're right!
Andre, you're right!
Sunday, February 28, 2010
Comments......... And other low lifes
It was my intention to never moderate comments. So I never learned how. Regrettably, I've had to learn how. To the Chinese guy who placed comments I had to remove on my blog, I say, stop coming here. If I have to learn how to exclude you from coming here, I guess I'll have to do that too. What a waste of my time.
Last night I had these 2 lowlifes who came out of Taco Bell on State just as I was going to pull away. I tell the woman that she should call a cab when she's ready to go, not when she gets in line to buy food. She immediately goes off on me that I have an attitude, and she'll get another cab driver, and she'll call the company and complain. She wasn't waiting in line for food, she was standing inside by the TV. Watching TV instead of watching for the cab. She insists she was watching for the cab and again goes into this litany of what she's going to do to me.
Ok, out of the cab. What???? You heard me, out of the cab. I'm going to go and do something else and you're going to get another driver. When they're out, I key the mike on channel 2 and tell the phone guy about it. And guess what? Did they get a red and white to take their sorry drunk ass's home? I doubt it. If they did, they did it as flags because no call was accepted over the phone.
Last night I had these 2 lowlifes who came out of Taco Bell on State just as I was going to pull away. I tell the woman that she should call a cab when she's ready to go, not when she gets in line to buy food. She immediately goes off on me that I have an attitude, and she'll get another cab driver, and she'll call the company and complain. She wasn't waiting in line for food, she was standing inside by the TV. Watching TV instead of watching for the cab. She insists she was watching for the cab and again goes into this litany of what she's going to do to me.
Ok, out of the cab. What???? You heard me, out of the cab. I'm going to go and do something else and you're going to get another driver. When they're out, I key the mike on channel 2 and tell the phone guy about it. And guess what? Did they get a red and white to take their sorry drunk ass's home? I doubt it. If they did, they did it as flags because no call was accepted over the phone.
Sunday, February 21, 2010
Sunday night
Weird weekend. And it finished weird too.
There's this hotel on Hayes rd. that I've taken women to, who struck me as prostitutes. There's nothing wrong with being a prostitute, but usually they don't tip. You'd think they'd be smart enough to want to be on the right side of everybody in their little world. Nope.
Anyway, I get this girl, she's around 21 out of this hotel and she wants a round trip to Arby's. Ok. I've also got Red Robin going to 51 & 151 to get so I tell the girl, ok I'll do her round trip but how we do it is going to depend on what the other passenger is doing. Between the motel and Red Robin her phone rings and she starts talking to this john. The waitress from Red Robin gets in, she wants to go to Walgreen's.
So I tell the girl with the phone we'll drop the waitress off before we go to Arby's. The entire time the waitress is in the cab the girl with the phone is talking to 2 different john's. 'I get $200 for this, I get $150 for that. No, you can't sleep in bed with me all night, but we can sort of work out what you want for $250.', and so on.
Waitress gets out, and I ask the kid where bozo's like the one she just finished talking to get her number from. 'Oh, places.............' I tell the kid that the cab is a public place and if I was her, I'd turn that cell phone off when I got in the cab. I also made a loud comment about a waitress not tipping, kid apparently got that, she tipped $2.00. First time any of the prostitutes tipped.
Then the guy calls back and wants directions to where she is. So I ask her where he is, she tells me HWY 14 coming into the south side of town. Ok, tell the guy to take the beltline east to I90, get off at East Washington, get on the frontage road on the north side of the street, go back toward the interstate and he'll see the place you say you want to meet him at. She had almost $35.00 in cab fare and Arby's, for a couple of combo's.
I then checked it in. Worst Sunday I've had in over a year.
Clueless people. Simply Clueless.
There's this hotel on Hayes rd. that I've taken women to, who struck me as prostitutes. There's nothing wrong with being a prostitute, but usually they don't tip. You'd think they'd be smart enough to want to be on the right side of everybody in their little world. Nope.
Anyway, I get this girl, she's around 21 out of this hotel and she wants a round trip to Arby's. Ok. I've also got Red Robin going to 51 & 151 to get so I tell the girl, ok I'll do her round trip but how we do it is going to depend on what the other passenger is doing. Between the motel and Red Robin her phone rings and she starts talking to this john. The waitress from Red Robin gets in, she wants to go to Walgreen's.
So I tell the girl with the phone we'll drop the waitress off before we go to Arby's. The entire time the waitress is in the cab the girl with the phone is talking to 2 different john's. 'I get $200 for this, I get $150 for that. No, you can't sleep in bed with me all night, but we can sort of work out what you want for $250.', and so on.
Waitress gets out, and I ask the kid where bozo's like the one she just finished talking to get her number from. 'Oh, places.............' I tell the kid that the cab is a public place and if I was her, I'd turn that cell phone off when I got in the cab. I also made a loud comment about a waitress not tipping, kid apparently got that, she tipped $2.00. First time any of the prostitutes tipped.
Then the guy calls back and wants directions to where she is. So I ask her where he is, she tells me HWY 14 coming into the south side of town. Ok, tell the guy to take the beltline east to I90, get off at East Washington, get on the frontage road on the north side of the street, go back toward the interstate and he'll see the place you say you want to meet him at. She had almost $35.00 in cab fare and Arby's, for a couple of combo's.
I then checked it in. Worst Sunday I've had in over a year.
Clueless people. Simply Clueless.
Saturday, February 20, 2010
The rabbi and the preacher
I had a Hasidic Rebbe in my cab Thursday night. Before he got in my cab he asked at least 10 drivers in the cab stand at the airport to high flag his ride to the park and ride for less than 20 bucks. He was very persistent. I must go and discuss this with the local guy. It's dismaying that such a pious fellow on the face of it would ask 10 guys to rip off their employers.
When he was putting his stuff in my trunk I said, "Erev tov." As we drove down the street he asked me if I was Jewish and I said, "ken." For those of you who haven't taken Hebrew, that was good evening and yes. We got as far as, "Koreemli hoffny", and I had to offer explanation in English, I guess my accent is as bad as his English accent was.
The preacher is a driver who's been driving about half as long as I have. He was telling me about doing stuff he did when he was a kid. Guess he was a banger in southern CA. Wild stories. He worries about people not understanding. Like the rebbe, he's got enough kids to put a football team on a field. I wonder what he's going to do when the first one of his kids bangs. He can say they won't all he wants, but they're kids, like he was.
I had to do this post on the sabbath, since the guy asking drivers to rip their boss's made a big deal out of did I observe the sabbath. I say, "Why is today different than any other day?" This is a classic Jewish question about the sabbath, it's supposed to be that you observe the desires of the Almighty every day, right? I need the money every day.
When he was putting his stuff in my trunk I said, "Erev tov." As we drove down the street he asked me if I was Jewish and I said, "ken." For those of you who haven't taken Hebrew, that was good evening and yes. We got as far as, "Koreemli hoffny", and I had to offer explanation in English, I guess my accent is as bad as his English accent was.
The preacher is a driver who's been driving about half as long as I have. He was telling me about doing stuff he did when he was a kid. Guess he was a banger in southern CA. Wild stories. He worries about people not understanding. Like the rebbe, he's got enough kids to put a football team on a field. I wonder what he's going to do when the first one of his kids bangs. He can say they won't all he wants, but they're kids, like he was.
I had to do this post on the sabbath, since the guy asking drivers to rip their boss's made a big deal out of did I observe the sabbath. I say, "Why is today different than any other day?" This is a classic Jewish question about the sabbath, it's supposed to be that you observe the desires of the Almighty every day, right? I need the money every day.
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
I've had too much weighing me down lately
Before I forget, I don't speak to The Elder anymore. Seems there was a call at Majestic that went to Witte Saturday night, and he bid for it and got it. I pulled past Majestic and 4 girls wanted a ride to Landon so I took them. Elder watched me load the flags, and followed me up to the square, told the dispatcher that I'd stolen his call, pulled along side of me and screamed that I owed him an envelope. Now, while he's doing this, his people probably came out of Majestic and got into yet another cab and left. So Sunday night, JJ lets him accuse me of being a thief over the radio. And he won't let go of it. He loses a friend, he apparantly didn't get his $7 when it was super busy and he just should have moved on, what an idiot. He's not worth talking to.
I had an interesting conversation with Schnidley. He told me about an armed robbery/car jacking from years ago. So, Friday, I'm loading this guy with alzhimers from an adult day care, and I said to myself, "If anybody says to me they're going to blow my head off if I don't give them the money, I'm going to tell them to do it." I never intended to live to this age, I don't much care for being old, there's nobody to take care of me in my old age, I don't want to feel it, and I don't want to see it coming. So, I'll toss it into reverse and floor it, and take it from there. It always helps if you've thought of it in advance, and have a plan.
I visited another driver yesterday, and she told me I wasn't happy. She's right.
However, she had another guest who brought my spirits up a lot. The guest was a person named TJ that I know from the dog park. I also pretty much know Lynette from the dog park. So it was mostly a meeting of 3 dog park people. But I've known Lynette for many years, she drove a red and white before she drove a yellow cab. It was a really great, really informative discussion.
I was able to make a decision that would relive a lot of the discomfort I've had about my living situation. Lynette assures me that Smiley (my dog) can stay with her for a while if need be, and I trust her to be as good as her word on that. I can stay in a motel.
TJ was a cop for a number of years, so I asked TJ a question like, you've been in court more than most people, how does a judge react to a con artist? She said that judges don't like them, and that they can do what ever they want in their court room. So what I'm going to do with my con artist landlord/room mate is tape the rent check to his door, get a couple of friends to come over and put a dirty thumb print on the edge of the door and check, and come back in March and verify that it's still there. My room mate won't come and take the check, he's going to say I didn't pay the rent, when the issue will really be he didn't accept payment. Something else she said was, he won't get in front of a judge quickly. That's something I hadn't taken into account, but she made a big deal out of it. As soon as the snow is gone, I pretty much want to be gone from here too. So, by the time it gets to court, I might be gone anyway.
Something else that both of them told me that was fascinating was how contrived both police departments and schools are. When I was a kid, I didn't fit in well in school, and the older I get, the more I question if I ever had a chance. Both Lynette and TJ are former school teachers, and both say that the office politics of being a school teacher are intense. This says to me that if some of the teachers don't like your mother, you will will get bad grades, get behaviour evaluations saying you don't get along well, and so on. When I was a kid, my mother was disliked by the elementary school staff in general, and I can fully understand why. My mother and father were of the opinion that the school should pretty much raise their children, and the school didn't agree. By the time my brother and sister hit the schools my mother knew better than to push it that way, but it followed me all the way through.
This said, I also have to color it a bit with the change in society over the years. I wonder if policing was the cherry job then that it is today. Teaching certainly wasn't. Back then, a teacher didn't make a whole lot more than a guy in a car plant with 10 years on the job. Hard to say. All the people who could say are motly dead.
In my old age I've become something of an expert in not getting tickets. There's a technique to it, and even when I've deserved a ticket, they've let me off recently.
Poor quality rambling post isn't it? Oh well...............
I had an interesting conversation with Schnidley. He told me about an armed robbery/car jacking from years ago. So, Friday, I'm loading this guy with alzhimers from an adult day care, and I said to myself, "If anybody says to me they're going to blow my head off if I don't give them the money, I'm going to tell them to do it." I never intended to live to this age, I don't much care for being old, there's nobody to take care of me in my old age, I don't want to feel it, and I don't want to see it coming. So, I'll toss it into reverse and floor it, and take it from there. It always helps if you've thought of it in advance, and have a plan.
I visited another driver yesterday, and she told me I wasn't happy. She's right.
However, she had another guest who brought my spirits up a lot. The guest was a person named TJ that I know from the dog park. I also pretty much know Lynette from the dog park. So it was mostly a meeting of 3 dog park people. But I've known Lynette for many years, she drove a red and white before she drove a yellow cab. It was a really great, really informative discussion.
I was able to make a decision that would relive a lot of the discomfort I've had about my living situation. Lynette assures me that Smiley (my dog) can stay with her for a while if need be, and I trust her to be as good as her word on that. I can stay in a motel.
TJ was a cop for a number of years, so I asked TJ a question like, you've been in court more than most people, how does a judge react to a con artist? She said that judges don't like them, and that they can do what ever they want in their court room. So what I'm going to do with my con artist landlord/room mate is tape the rent check to his door, get a couple of friends to come over and put a dirty thumb print on the edge of the door and check, and come back in March and verify that it's still there. My room mate won't come and take the check, he's going to say I didn't pay the rent, when the issue will really be he didn't accept payment. Something else she said was, he won't get in front of a judge quickly. That's something I hadn't taken into account, but she made a big deal out of it. As soon as the snow is gone, I pretty much want to be gone from here too. So, by the time it gets to court, I might be gone anyway.
Something else that both of them told me that was fascinating was how contrived both police departments and schools are. When I was a kid, I didn't fit in well in school, and the older I get, the more I question if I ever had a chance. Both Lynette and TJ are former school teachers, and both say that the office politics of being a school teacher are intense. This says to me that if some of the teachers don't like your mother, you will will get bad grades, get behaviour evaluations saying you don't get along well, and so on. When I was a kid, my mother was disliked by the elementary school staff in general, and I can fully understand why. My mother and father were of the opinion that the school should pretty much raise their children, and the school didn't agree. By the time my brother and sister hit the schools my mother knew better than to push it that way, but it followed me all the way through.
This said, I also have to color it a bit with the change in society over the years. I wonder if policing was the cherry job then that it is today. Teaching certainly wasn't. Back then, a teacher didn't make a whole lot more than a guy in a car plant with 10 years on the job. Hard to say. All the people who could say are motly dead.
In my old age I've become something of an expert in not getting tickets. There's a technique to it, and even when I've deserved a ticket, they've let me off recently.
Poor quality rambling post isn't it? Oh well...............
Monday, February 15, 2010
Make my day
I had some of the most obnoxious passengers I've ever had in my cab over the weekend.
Friday night these 2 sweet little faggots get in the cab going to Plan B. Actually, I shouldn't say that. One of them was rail thin, gestured with a limp wrist, and spoke that whiny nelly dialect of fag. The other was a tough guy, hair cut in a mohawk. They were young, and 2 other folks got in going to a different destination. Less than 2 blocks into the ride, the kid with the mohawk says, "I think it's really going to stink in here in a minute. I just farted, ha ha, about a week ago I emptied 12 guys out of the kitchen at a gay mens party, ha ha."
So I rolled down the windows, and it really did stink. The other passengers agreed it really stunk, and the guy said, he might have to fart again ha ha before we got to the bar. So I left the windows down. The whiny one complained that he was cold. I said something about the guy shitting himself in my cab so the windows would stay down. So the tough guy pulled out his cell phone and called (really foul mouth) and told the dispatcher to order me to roll up the windows. I pointed out that I'd turned the radio off at that point.
Just like so many obnoxious bastards before him, he was going to have me fired by 9 am Monday morning. Then when we got a block from the bar, he said he wasn't going to pay. I forgot that I have cop doors in the back seat, most cabs they turn that feature off in, but if I lock them, they can't unlock them. I went to do a fast Uturn through a gas station and he had the door open and was trying to leap. He did leap, and I grabbed the whiny ones coat. He's going to kick my ass. "I'm going to kick you ass old man."
"Son, you're not going to kick anybody's ass."
At moments like that it's real tempting to get out and show him how pathetic his skills are, but he'd keep getting up until I did something to keep him down, and for doing that the cops would take me to jail.
I had these 2 slick little putz's from Long Island who said take us to Majestic, then when we got there, their friends weren't there so they started this, no we said Orphiem crap. It wasn't worth a confrontation, but I did tell the little putz that paid that he'd never get in my cab again, and I will call him a putz to his face if he ever tries. I took a long look at him before I gave change to memorize his pudgy face and dimensions.
And finally, drum roll please, I had the 2 pair from the tittie bar between Middleton and Cross Plains going to campus. 2 guys, and 2 girls, all 4 went to look at the girls. So the guy who's in the back seat, starts asking the woman in the middle for a blow job. Normally you hear something like shut the fuck up, or stone silence, but she was handling it. So I let her handle it. About 3 miles into the ride she's getting fed up with it, and I tell the guy to shut up, now he's going to kick my ass. So I lock the back seat doors. Lady in the middle seat says kick him out, I say I've got a better idea. My plan is to take him to State st., find a cop, and he can spend the weekend in jail for sexual assault, and disorderly. Ladies don't want to be in that police report, so they say they'll drop it if their cab fare is paid, so I make the guy who hasn't done anything pay for him and his room mates ride, and pay for the ladies ride. Expensive trip to the titty bar.
I take the ladies to close to where they live and they say let us out at Dayton and Mills, so I did. Mr. Mouth gets out too. Guy who paid says take me home. I get most of a single block and he says, "I have to get out. I have to make sure he doesn't do anything bad."
How did that turn out? Who knows, who cares. What fun, right?
Friday night these 2 sweet little faggots get in the cab going to Plan B. Actually, I shouldn't say that. One of them was rail thin, gestured with a limp wrist, and spoke that whiny nelly dialect of fag. The other was a tough guy, hair cut in a mohawk. They were young, and 2 other folks got in going to a different destination. Less than 2 blocks into the ride, the kid with the mohawk says, "I think it's really going to stink in here in a minute. I just farted, ha ha, about a week ago I emptied 12 guys out of the kitchen at a gay mens party, ha ha."
So I rolled down the windows, and it really did stink. The other passengers agreed it really stunk, and the guy said, he might have to fart again ha ha before we got to the bar. So I left the windows down. The whiny one complained that he was cold. I said something about the guy shitting himself in my cab so the windows would stay down. So the tough guy pulled out his cell phone and called (really foul mouth) and told the dispatcher to order me to roll up the windows. I pointed out that I'd turned the radio off at that point.
Just like so many obnoxious bastards before him, he was going to have me fired by 9 am Monday morning. Then when we got a block from the bar, he said he wasn't going to pay. I forgot that I have cop doors in the back seat, most cabs they turn that feature off in, but if I lock them, they can't unlock them. I went to do a fast Uturn through a gas station and he had the door open and was trying to leap. He did leap, and I grabbed the whiny ones coat. He's going to kick my ass. "I'm going to kick you ass old man."
"Son, you're not going to kick anybody's ass."
At moments like that it's real tempting to get out and show him how pathetic his skills are, but he'd keep getting up until I did something to keep him down, and for doing that the cops would take me to jail.
I had these 2 slick little putz's from Long Island who said take us to Majestic, then when we got there, their friends weren't there so they started this, no we said Orphiem crap. It wasn't worth a confrontation, but I did tell the little putz that paid that he'd never get in my cab again, and I will call him a putz to his face if he ever tries. I took a long look at him before I gave change to memorize his pudgy face and dimensions.
And finally, drum roll please, I had the 2 pair from the tittie bar between Middleton and Cross Plains going to campus. 2 guys, and 2 girls, all 4 went to look at the girls. So the guy who's in the back seat, starts asking the woman in the middle for a blow job. Normally you hear something like shut the fuck up, or stone silence, but she was handling it. So I let her handle it. About 3 miles into the ride she's getting fed up with it, and I tell the guy to shut up, now he's going to kick my ass. So I lock the back seat doors. Lady in the middle seat says kick him out, I say I've got a better idea. My plan is to take him to State st., find a cop, and he can spend the weekend in jail for sexual assault, and disorderly. Ladies don't want to be in that police report, so they say they'll drop it if their cab fare is paid, so I make the guy who hasn't done anything pay for him and his room mates ride, and pay for the ladies ride. Expensive trip to the titty bar.
I take the ladies to close to where they live and they say let us out at Dayton and Mills, so I did. Mr. Mouth gets out too. Guy who paid says take me home. I get most of a single block and he says, "I have to get out. I have to make sure he doesn't do anything bad."
How did that turn out? Who knows, who cares. What fun, right?
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