Wednesday, December 29, 2010

The story of the crockergator

A friend asked for the story of the crockergator. Well, she didn't really, but she did ask what a crockergator was, which is sort of the same thing. I was told this story around 40 years ago. It's designed to have a dig in it about a minority group, but that doesn't keep it from being funny.

And after you've hear the story of the crockergator, here's something you can do. If you're sitting around buzzed, say about 10 minutes after the pipe went around, quietly whisper crockergator. I can still picture my first wife's face, she'd turn and say, "Did you just say crockergator?"

Then you say, "Nah, what kind of BS is that?"

And it can go back and forth for 10 minutes. Yes you did. No I didn't. And at the end, you both laugh your ass's off. Now.... the story of the crockergator.

Picture 3 really poorly educated fellows sitting on a porch in Chicago, on a hot summer day. (fill in the ethnic slur of your choice) The first one says, "Do you know what the meanest animal in the world is? It's the lion, because the lion tear yo ass up."

The second fellow says, "Nah man, it's the gorilla, cause the gorilla tear the lion's ass up."

The third fellow has a sly grin, and he's slowly shaking his head no, back and forth. He says, "Nah. It's the crockergator."

Second guy says, "Crockergator?! You mean Alligator."

Third guy's grin widens and he says, "Nah....! Crockergator. The crockergator tear the gorilla's ass and the lion's ass up! He got alligator head at one end and crocodile head at the other."

First guy says, "Well, if he got alligator head at one end, and crocodile head at the other how do he sh#t?"

Third guy says, "That why he's so mean!!!"

To those of you out there saying to yourself, what a jerk, telling a story like that, all I can say is every ethnic group has 3 guys like that. Mine, yours, and all the others too. If you can say that none of your folk tell ethnic stories, all I can say is your folk must be better than mine. Are your folk better? And, did you chuckle?

To tie this back to cab driving, something every cab driver should have is a collection of really good stories to tell to customers. If you can make them laugh, they generally tip better.

1 comment:

Shadow said...

so you're a real cab driver, are you??? you much has a wealth of stories to tell. and thanks for your visit. i appreciate it.